Being Plus Sized

All my life, I've grown up with the idea ingrained in my head that being plus sized is a very bad thing. After I hit puberty in 2nd/3rd grade, I became a chubby kid and I never really lost that weight. For a long time I stayed around the same size, but near the end of middle school and into high school I went up a size. 

I panicked, knowing that I was getting closer to the dreaded plus size section of the store. But not quite, I could still shop in the regular women's sizes. Even the juniors sizes for shirts and such. The only problem was the jeans I wore never fit just right. They were either too big in the legs and too tight in the hips, or they fit my legs just right but then I was left with this super huge waist that looked awful. I couldn't find a pair of pants that were just right. Until the day I decided to venture into Torrid. 

I think everyone knows that Wal-Mart, Target, Goodwill, and other places like that has awful plus sized clothes. They just don't look appealing at all, and it was drilled into my head that I should be disgusted with myself if I ever needed to get those types of pants. 

I walked into Torrid expecting the worst. I went in there hating myself for even considering shopping at a plus size store. But when I tried that first pair of jeans on in the dressing room, holy crap did my opinion change. For the first time in forever, I was wearing a pair of jeans that fit me perfectly. They fit my legs, they fit my hips, and they even made my butt look good! The next pair of jeans I tried on had the same effect, and then I started to have a change of mind. 

I had learned to hate plus sized clothing. I thought that if you had to wear plus sized clothing you were a disgusting person and you needed to lose weight. That's not the case. Very far from it. I don't need a size tag on my clothes to tell me anything. All it means is that I need to shop for that size. It doesn't define who I am, it doesn't tell me that I'm ugly or a terrible person. 

And you know what the most important thing I discovered is? I like being plus sized. I really do. Just because I have a few extra pounds on me doesn't mean I'm not a human being. There are so many plus sized people out there who are stunning and gorgeous and how am I any different from them? Torrid has really fricking adorable clothes and I love shopping there. For the first time in my life, I'm not afraid to shop for clothes that actually fit me. I have plenty of clothes that don't fit me that I wore because it was highest size I could go before I got to plus size. I put them on now, and they are so uncomfortable. Now that I know how absolutely wonderful it is to have clothes that fit me, that flatter my body and make me look good, I know I'm not going back. 

Being plus sized doesn't mean a damn thing unless you tell yourself it does. And that's the one thing I'm still working on overcoming. I have to tell myself daily that it doesn't matter what size I am. After spending so many years believing that being fat was the worst thing a person could be, I have a lot of work to do. Day by day I'm overcoming that way of thinking, and embracing the person I am. Do I want to lose weight? Of course, I think everyone can think of a few pounds they'd like to lose. But I want to focus more on being healthy. I would rather lead a healthy life, and if I happen to lose weight because of that, that's great. But I'm not going to obsess over it like I have been. 

Another thing that has been weighing on my mind lately is that it really sucks that for some people, they have conditions for being friends with/loving someone. If you're so shallow that all you can see when you look at me is the fat on my body, then I want you to pack your bags and leave. If you can't love me as a plus sized girl, I don't want you around. I want to be enough for people. I don't want other people telling me what I should and shouldn't do. 

"You should go work out!" Why? Why should I work out? Is there a reason? Oh, because I should lose weight? Suck it. 

"You shouldn't eat that, it's bad for you." Oh, but you can eat it? It's just as bad for you as it is for me. What's the difference if I eat it vs. you eating it? 

So, to sum this whole big long post up, the whole message I was getting at today is this:

I am plus sized, and I am okay with that. If you can't handle that, or can't accept that fact, I don't want you around in my life. I do not live to please you, I live to please myself.

P.S. Plus sized people are more fun to snuggle with. We're like a huge warm pillow that hugs back. And I have big boobs, so I'll never have to spend a crapton of money getting a boob job. Hah, take that!

Can We Take A Minute?

Rant post!

Okay, let's take a minute here to acknowledge that something is seriously wrong with this generation here!

What am I talking about, you ask? I am talking about the fact that the term "side chick" is becoming more and more popular over the last few months.

Let's back up. My rant started earlier today while I was checking facebook. I was just scrolling down my newsfeed, minding my own business, when I saw this picture:

What the actual...? I heard this phrase "side chick" a few months ago and I've just been ignoring it, but this just set me off. New to this phrase? Here, according to Urban Dictionary:

UM OKAY LET'S NOT!! Really? Is this really becoming a thing? Is this really becoming an acceptable thing?! WHY?!?! You do know that it's not right to cheat on your girl, right?! 

Seriously, what the mother effing eff with this generation growing up here? What kind of households are these poor kids growing up in that they think that this is okay? Let me tell you something kids:

THIS IS NOT OKAY!!!

Girls, how can you put up with this? Is this what you think is normal? Is this what you think a normal, healthy relationship is like? It's not! If a guy really and truly cares for you,  he will not have a "sidechick" because that's cheating. Did Prince Charming have a few other girls he was sleeping with while he was on the hunt for Cinderella? NO. Was Beast screwing some girl on the side while Belle was off enjoying the library that he gave her? NO. Let's even go with the example of Barney Stinson. Good ole Barney was the king of being a man-whore. He had a flipping playbook of moves he would use to get girls to sleep with him. He slept with so many women throughout the 9 seasons of How I Met Your Mother. But when Barney was with Robin, did he cheat on her? Did he have a "sidechick" while he was dating/married to Robin? NO! Why? Because he loved her. 

Girls, please, if you think this is normal for your boyfriend to have sidechicks, please, run as fast as you can and get the hell away from that douche bag. Why? Because he doesn't really love you. This is not normal, this is not okay, and you deserve SO MUCH BETTER. 

And for the guys - if you are one of those guys that thinks this is an acceptable way of life, you deserve to get hit by a bus. You should not EVER put a girl through this kind of crap. Do you really think karma won't come back and bite you in the ass? If you are one of these boys, you are a douche bag that should get his wang cut off. 

Let's reverse the situation. If you're dating a girl, and you find out that this girl has been cheating on you with her side dudes, what are you going to do? Dump her, right? Because cheating is wrong! Why would you be with a girl who gives herself to other dudes? That's your girl! And she's giving all her goods to other guys. That's not okay! So why is it okay for you to do it? 

And parents - BE A BETTER INFLUENCE. I know cheating is a lot more out in the open than it used to  be, and many marriages have been ruined because of crap like this. But please, please, for the love of God, make sure your children know that cheating is a very bad thing to do. 

And if you don't believe that this sidechick thing is a real thing, just google it. Better yet, google the "rules for being a sidechick". They exist. And it's sickening. 

Love is special, love is one of the greatest things that humans experience, and this whole sidechick thing is ruining it. It's disgusting and sickening. Girls, if your man is involved in something like this, you're a damn idiot for sticking around. Go find someone who actually loves you, who dedicates 100% of his time to making you feel like a damn princess because that's how it should be. 

And guys, keep your damn dick in your pants and get your crap straightened out. You're a disgusting human being if this is you. 

Hello Fall!

Hello Fall, you sexy son of a bitch. We've missed you! The leaves are starting to change, the temperature is dropping to perfection and life is goooooood. As of today there is 27 days until I get to see Dan, and I hope it goes quick. I have a whole list of things that we're going to do, since this is the first time we've been able to do fall-y things together. Pumpkin picking, carving said pumpkins, Halloween party.. all of that jazz. I can't wait :) 

On Saturday we meandered down to the State Fair grounds for Harvest Fest, which turned out to be really cute and fun. It was me and my sister, my co-worker and her daughter, and another one of the new girls at work. 

And then on Sunday, my family took advantage of the beautiful weather and we all cruised up to Holy Hill. You might remember my post from back in May, which you can read right here if you missed it. This time around, the scenery looks a lot different. It's absolutely beautiful, and we were having so much fun running around snapping pictures of the beautiful trees and the church. And this time we got to go inside, so I got pictures from in there, too. 

And it was such a beautiful, clear day, that if I zoomed far enough on my camera, I could see the Milwaukee skyline. Keep in mind, Holy Hill is about 33 miles away from Milwaukee. 

Have a great October 1st everyone!